How I live Now

I thought I'd better give some of the details of my daily life, because some people don't seems to think about what the reality of my situation is.

I sleep outside a supermarket that only closes its doors at about 9pm. There are some people who sell fried chicken on the corner and until about 3am there is a constant passage of people arriving on motorbikes and mopeds and shouting and cheering and stuff. There a lot of mosquitoes and I get bitten a lot. At 6:30 they arrive and open the supermarket.

I only have 60,000 pesos left of the 100,000 I arrived here with, and if I want to sit on a chair then I have to buy a bottle of coca cola for 1,500 pesos. Otherwise I sit on the side of the street. There are very, very few trees in town and it gets hot as hell during the early afternoon. It is dusty and noisy and I have nobody to talk to. If I want to wash, I can at least walk 1km to the beach and wash in the sea.

At this place I use Internet, the woman who runs it can barely disguise her dislike of me. They leave the terminal next to me playing music loud enough that they can hear it all over the shop, which means that even with the headphones they supply I cannot hear what I want to listen to, unless I plug my own headphones into the machine next to me to stop the speakers. That will probably piss her off even more when she realises that it's what I do.

So I have nothing to do all day, and I have no privacy and no comfortable place to be. And what for? I don't know. So that I can imagine the converstions people have about me but which I am not allowed to join in? Or so that I can get shit like this from my stupid fucking daughter? I have already made it very clear I do not want anything to do with her or her fucking mother, but no, it must go on, and on, and on, .... Because Cambridge and the fucking fleamasons have to be all over my case, all the time. She is referring to a mysterious sum of $120 they want to send me because "the money from my mother was delayed when they sent it to Cali" It is a useless amount of money. I told my mother explicitly, that if she wants to carry on sending this useless insulting crap, she has to do it independently of these two fucking whores. They refuse to acknowledge my totally unreasonable demand of US$10,000 a temporary passport and a flight to Washington DC. Instead they want to send me $120 dollars so I can spend another month in this fucking shit hole of a town doing fuck-all while they control "the conversation" in which I am not allowed to participate. This is the shit I got from her today:

I'm going to keep offering anyway, in case you change your mind. Where would you like us to send your money?

Ian Grant<...>27 oct. at 17:45

I don't want any help from you for anything.

Helen Grant<...>26 oct. at 17:44

Dad, I’ve seen your blog post and just want to help you get to a doctor for your injury. What can I do to help?


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